Tabloid Time again, and let me tell you, it’s slim pickings! The Enquirer has the usual Angelina and baby storyline aka, she’s working too much and the baby could be at risk; how Kelly Ripa is seeking revenge on Regis; and Farrah Fawcett’s drug hell (really, I hadn’t noticed). The Star has more on Jessica Simpson’s relationships, Brangelina’s secret Paris honeymoon, and where there is Brangelina, there is ALWAYS Jennifer and Vince. Us has more on Jessica’s relationships and what people wore at the Grammys….boring! And for a change of pace, Entertainment Weekly has Steve Carell on the cover, so I picked it up.

The Enquirer…

Page 2 – Apparently Madonna ought to ease up on the dancing, as it’s caused her to have a hernia. The day after the Grammys, she was at Cedar-Sinai Medical Center bright and early having surgery for it, and is apparently recovering nicely. Hmmmm…is all that gyrating becoming too much for the Material (Woman) Girl?

Page 4 – Nice tongue shot of Ryan Seacrest kissing a blonde bombshell…yuck!

Page 7 – The whole boring story of how Angelina could be putting her baby at risk because she’s working all the time. Whatever.

Page 22 – Here begins the tell-all, 2 or 3-parter of the Farrah Fawcett story and how she blames Ryan for their son, Redmond’s, drug addiction. According to the cover of the Enquirer, it looked as though it were Farrah’s personal drug problem…wrong! It’s Redmond’s; not so entertaining.

Page 29 – According to the Enquirer, Kelly is being courted to replace Katie Couric when Katie supposedly leaves NBC for the CBS anchor chair in May, which for Kelly, would be the perfect revenge for the mega contract that Regis was given to stay on at Regis and Kelly for 4 more years. And that is revenge how?

The Star…

For my Fashionista’s, Page 3 begins the parade of do’s and don’t dresses worn at the Grammys.

Page 35 – What is up with the transformation makeovers on Mary-Kate and Ashley? They look deadful (I mean dreadful!) You’ve got to see this. Apparently, they’ve given up sloppy chic (that’s what it’s called?) and gone to Ghastly Ghoulish, oh excuse me, I mean Haute Couture; I don’t think so. They look like little girls playing dress-up in mommy’s hair, make-up and heels.

Page 46 – Jessica and Jude Law look to be hooking up.

Page 48 – Photos of Brangelina with the kids on their “secret” honeymoon in Paris. How secret can it be if everyone has photos of it!!!

Next page, what else – JENNIFER FEARING 40! No Oscar, no baby, no husband, no ***t! For god sakes, she’s only 37! She’s got 3 more years before the dreaded 40, and bazillion’s of dollars in the bank. Get over it!

Us Weekly

Page 18 – starts the Glitzy Grammy Gowns; don’t waste your time. They are almost the same photos as in the Star.

All the way to Page 56 - here you get a 4-page spread on Jessica Simpson, if you don’t already have enough of her….ugh!

Page 72 – The same makeover photos of the Olsen twins that the Star has.

I’m telling, don’t waste your money this week on Us.

Entertainment Weekly – I think of this magazine as an extension of TV Guide. It offers in-depth interviews with mostly TV stars, and tells what’s on TV. I actually bought it this week because of the cover story on Steve Carell.

Page 20 starts THE OFFICE review. I’ve got to say, I didn’t like this show in the beginning because I was comparing it to the original BBC version with Ricky Gervais, which was hysterical. But it’s found it’s own legs, and I actually look forward to watching it each week.

That is all…