It’s Tabloid Time! This week, you’ve got to look at the alleged drug den that is Whitney Houston’s bathroom. Come on! This is the cover of the Enquirer, apparently exposed through Bobby Brown’s sister, Tina Brown. Also, looks like Katie and Tom had a big fight over the baby…again. The Star is reporting that Nick and Jessica are back together, and Angelina walked out on Brad…yeah, right. Us is reporting that Jessica had a hot spring fling; obviously, they didn’t see the Star article about she and Nick getting back together. Oh, and it looks like Teri Hatcher has moved on from George Clooney to Ryan Seacrest.
The Enquirer…
Page 3 – rumors are swirling that Jen and Vince are going to elope before the June 2nd opening of their flick “The Break-Up”; probably in a quiet ceremony somewhere in Mexico or California Wine Country. Apparently, she’s had enough of the Brangelina triangle, and wants to move on. Stay tuned…
Page 5 – The whole sorted story of the tension between Katie and Tom, and how she wants to have the baby in a hospital with doctors standing by and he’s insisting on a quiet, alone place connected with Scientology. What’s the matter with him? Doesn’t he want what’s best for his wife and child?
Page 6 – Hey Britney, guess what? Champagne and wine ARE considered booze, and very unhealthy for a four month old fetus. What in the hell is wrong with you?!!! If you think partying it up “K-Fed” in Vegas is worth risking the health of your unborn baby, think again. He’s still going to party all the time, with or without you, AND with (alleged) other women; you drinking and partying with him in Vegas isn’t going to stop that. Good Christ.
Page 30 – The cover story of Whitney’s Drug Den (which appears to be her bathroom—allegedly) and most prominently displaying a crack pipe. Hey, maybe it’s not a crack pipe, maybe she or Bobby have taken up tobacco pipe smoking…who knows! Apparently, she sees demons when she’s high, and has started beating herself up with her fists because of it. Her sister-in-law, Tina, hopes that by telling the story of her partying with Whitney, she will be able to get Whitney to pull her life together…yeah, right.
Once a crack addict (allegedly)….
The Star…
Page 24 – Seems bootleg cut jeans our out, and skinny tapered legged jeans are in. Celebs like Sarah Jessica Parker, Lindsay Lohan, and Sienna Miller love them, and have been seen all over town in them. I better run out and do some shopping…
Page 44 – The Brangelina’s squabble. They are arguing over him not wanting to set a wedding date, his inability to compromise over issues with the kids, and their differing opinions over politics. Seems like a normal relationship to me.
Page 58 – Has 15 headshots of the men that Barbra Streisand claims she’s had relationships with. They’re all listed in her new tell-all book called, “Barbra, The Way She Is” by Christopher Andersen. NOTE TO BABS: better hope all your claims are true and not built around fiction; otherwise, Oprah will have you on her show, chastise you for misleading her and her viewing audience, and ruin your career.
Us Weekly…
Page 58 – photos of Ryan Seacrest and Teri Hatcher laughing and kissing at a beach. What happened to George, Teri?
That is all…