Tabloid Review W/E 07/07/06

Written on Sunday July 9, 2006

It’s Tabloid Time again. Let’s see what’s going on. The Enquirer is boasting Stedman is betraying Oprah with a tell all book; Babs is getting a head-to-toe makeover before her final “farewell” tour, and Star Jones is out to destroy Barbara Walters…yeah right. The Star has Johnny Depp’s secret double life, we’ll get to that if we have time…the rest looks rather dull.

First, as usual, the Enquirer…

Page 6 – Seems our favorite alien, Tom Cruise, is at war with girlfriend and mother of his alien child, Katie Holmes over the naming ceremony for Suri. Of course Tom wants a Church of Scientology ceremony, and Katie is insisting that Suri’s baptized Catholic. Good luck! And get this… Apparently, Suri will have 2 ceremonies, the first being a huge star studded event at the Hollywood Church of Scientology center, and then she will have the traditional Catholic ceremony later in the year. I wouldn’t believe it, Katie. Run away while you still can…

Page 10 - Star Jones is allegedly plotting her revenge against Barbara Walters, by planning to drag her into court with a multi-million dollar lawsuit. Star believes Barbara lied to her over the whole Rosie O’Donnell disaster. Oh, brother…boring.

Page 20 – Could Oprah’s beau, Stedman, give Oprah’s cult followers what they’ve always wanted to know - Oprah’s deepest, darkest secrets, or will Oprah write him a HUUUGGGE check to keep his mouth shut. Wait, she gives him an allowance already. Hmmmmm….I wonder. 20 years together; there’s great dirt there.

Page 38 – who doesn’t remember GUNSMOKE starring James Arnes. Rest assured, he’s recovering nicely after emergency stomach surgery in late June for a stomach ulcer. He’s 83 and still going strong.

Page 40 – Johnny Depp may be giving up his movie career to become Mr. Mom. He’s ready to take a rest and look after his 2 kids, Lily Rose, 7, and Jack, 4, whom he had with his longtime girlfriend of 8 years, Vanessa Paradis. He’s informed her that she should explore her love of films and music and do whatever she wants to do. He’s tired. Sounds like a pretty sweet deal to me.

The Star…

In Couples News…Apparently, Jennifer is saying that Vince is better in bed than Brad. Frankly, both of them give me the skeeves….

Apparently, Marcia Cross and stockbroker husband Tom Mahoney are already trying for a baby, just days after saying “I do”.

George Clooney and Krista Allen appear to be back together again.

Page 58 – Johnny Depps secret double life…he loves to stay home with his girlfriend and 2 kids. That’s it.

And that’s it from here too. See you next week!


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